Falling Apart

I hear people talking about fasting when they are seeking God's direction, but I've never understood. I mean, I could go a day without food. Do I do that to prove a point to God? That wouldn't make sense, biblically. I mean, I could deprive myself of a lot of things, doesn't make me any Holier. Unless of course God specifically has lead you to do that.

The last several days I've been in a place. A long line of circumstances have brought me to this place.  You know the place: discouraged, defeated...It feels like everything I touched was Rejected.

You feeling me? Rejected! I don't know how to explain it.

I could say so much here but I will sum it up with - Rejected.  Everything I did, it felt like It was being Rejected by God. Does that make sense?

A few days ago I hated that word because I felt it was stamped across my forehead. Where did I go wrong? Did I turn from HIM? 

But today if that word was tangible I would pick it up and kiss it. Anything that causes me to fall on my face and seek Him, with my eyes wide open, and off me,  looking for HIM and to see Him in a new light, yeah I could kiss it. :)

And that's what I believe God desires when He talks about Fasting. He desires our, "Falling Apart."

When you're Faced with Loneliness, that's God saying - "Fall Apart" (Psalms 25:15-17)

When you're gripped with Fear - "Fall Apart" (Psalms 56:3-4)

When you feel Rejected - "Fall APART"  (Psalms 43)

When your burden is too much to bear - "Fall Apart"  (Matthew 11:28-30)

When you're faced with confusion. - "Fall Apart"  (God will cause confusion so that you have no other option but to seek Him.)

When you're directionless - "Fall Apart"

When you've never experienced what I'm talking about, It's due time to. - "Fall Apart"

When your world around you is crumbling. QUIT carrying the load on your shoulders and - "FALL APART"

You can't pretend to be strong before God. He doesn't want you to be. We often feel the need to be tough for everyone, trying not to break because if I allow myself to fall apart everything else around me, that I am working so hard to carry, will crumble as well.  God doesn't need us to protect HIM. He's a Big GOD, He can handle it! He wants it.  His strength is made perfect in our weakness. Fall Apart before Him. It may take days or weeks, maybe even longer. However,

Psalms 30 -(check it out) is on your Horizon!!!

Verse 5...Weeping May Tarry for the Night,
   but JOY comes with the Morning.

I don't find it a coincidence that most of these verses came from Psalms. From David, who had a heart like His. David did A Lot of Falling Apart! If my Falling Apart creates in me a Heart like HIS. Break me LORD!

If, my friend, you have never felt like this. If you don't know how to fall apart before God. If you've never been so hungry for Him that you would rather die than go another moment without His Presence. Start praying for it. Start praying for that hunger. Pray that He will break you! 

That is where the "Living Water" Comes from. Being broken! (Psalms 51:17)

1 Chron. 28:9

“And you, my son Solomon, acknowledge the God of your father,

and serve him with wholehearted devotion and with a willing mind,

for the LORD searches every heart and understands every desire and every thought.

If you seek Him, He will be found by you; but if you forsake Him, He will reject you forever.

His Clay ~

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Eating Ashes

God has made my mind swim over the thought of Idolatry lately. What exactly it means, why does it matter and what are the idols I hold onto in my life. 

Here's what I'm learning: 

• Settling for satisfaction in anything other than Christ is Idolatry. 
• Anything we give more respect to, more of our time to, more of ourselves to, is an Idol.
• Anything that we enjoy more than our relationship with God is an Idol.

Yowch!
The Lord brought to my attention Isaiah 44:9-20  here are the verses that have really jumped out at me.

 Those who fashion a graven image are all of them futile, and

their precious things are of no profit;

even their own witnesses fail to see or know, - (it's become and accepted practice by others around) 
so that they will be put to shame.
Who has fashioned a god or cast an idol to no profit?
Behold, all his companions will be put to shame, for the

craftsmen themselves are mere men.

Isaiah 44:12-17 talks about the craftsman that takes this tree that he has planted and watched grow.  He cuts it down and part of it he uses it as wood in a stove, he shapes the wood and builds it into something beautiful to worship.

Jeremiah 10 discusses the same thing and it actually almost makes fun of it. The blind ritual of men.

Jer 10:3-5
3.For the customs of the peoples are vanity.
A tree from the forest is cut down
and worked with an axe by the hands of a craftsman.
4 They decorate it with silver and gold;
they fasten it with hammer and nails so that it cannot move.
⁵Their idols are like scarecrows in a cucumber field,
   and

they cannot speak; they have to be carried,
   for they cannot walk.
Do not be afraid of them, for they cannot do evil,
   neither is it in them to do good."

They've created this idol themselves. It's just a piece of wood. It cannot walk. It cannot talk and it Cannot Redeem them.

Isaiah 44:18-20 goes on to say 

¹⁸ They do not know, nor do they understand,

for He has smeared over their eyes so that they cannot see

and their hearts so that they cannot comprehend.

¹⁹ No one recalls, nor is there knowledge or understanding to say,

“I have burned half of it in the fire and also have baked bread over its coals. I roast meat and eat it. Then I make the rest of it into an abomination, I fall down before a block of wood!” ²⁰ He feeds on ashes; a deceived heart has turned him aside. And he cannot deliver himself, nor say, “Is there not a lie in my right hand?”  

The Lord had given them over to their stubborn heart. (Ps. 81:12) 

They could not see that they were fashioning idols out of their own hands. They were creating idols out of the same wood that they were using to cook their food or make into furniture. It was a stinking inanimate object and they were bowing down to it. He was eating Ashes looking to be filled.
I find it interesting that Ashes also symbolise death. Something that once was and no longer is because it has been burned. It's Gone, Dead.

How silly is that? How could they not see that they were worshiping a block of Wood? At least we aren't that dumb, Right?!?!  Or are we. Going back to the definition I gave at first:

• What are the idols we allow in our lives?
• What do we allow to dethrone God? 

Think about it. Is there anything in your life that you give more respect to? More time to? More Thought to? More Love, devotion, more dedication to?  What is on the throne in your life? It may be many Things.  Let me throw a list together of inanimate objects that do get in the way of our worship:

• Materialism... What keeps us from giving our tithes? 
• Keeping up with an image we want to portray.  Is it more important for us to get up extra early to look perfect vs. spending time with God?
• Television
• Dedication to our hobby: Sports, Fishing, Hunting, Reading, Facebook. Do you love It more than God?
• Gossip
• Any Known Sin that we are not willing to part with, because our "sin"  is more important.  We're settling for it's False Satisfaction. And it's an Idol!
• Keeping up our "Image" rather than a true righteous Heart.
• Selfishness. Always wanting my way! Closing my eyes to seeing things any other way.
• My Comfort Zone!
• Pride
• Insecurity
• Fear of being fully surrendered to Christ
• Lack of Trust
• Anything that we allow to hold us back from a Fully Surrendered Life in Christ is an Idol.
• Etc., Etc.

I am so Broken Hearted over Parents that say they want their children to Know God. Parents that say they want their child to grow in their walk with Him but it seems that God is Always put on the sidelines.  "Well, you can go to bible study or Church Camp or fill in the blank, As long as absolutely nothing else is going on."
May my life (or what I find worthy of my time) NEVER be what hinders my child from pursuing God! 
Parent is your heart not broken over this too? Look at that. What do you think your child sees when they see that the statements that our lives are making?  Are we ourselves putting the idols in our childrens lives? Parents that get annoyed over worship service going over 15mins but if their child's football game were to go into overtime, they'd be cheering the rest of the Game!

We have Got to start cheering for our child's pursuit of Christ!

What is it that we are allowing to get in our way of having a right relationship with God?

Is our life a reflection of the Fruit of the Spirit?  Galations 5

I have been humbled by the prayer of David:

Psalms 139

²³ Search me, oh God, and know my heart;
   test me and know my anxious thoughts.
²⁴ See if there is any offensive way in me,
   and lead me in the way everlasting.

I was talking to my dad and he said, it's one thing to ask a neighbor to point out their perceived flaws in my life but it's another to ask God to point them out. My neighbor only sees what I allow them to see. God knit me together in my mothers womb. He knows all my weaknesses and failures. There is no where I can flee from His presence. He knows my innermost thought. However, if you desire a life that is radically in love with Christ and you desire to see Him Radically move in your midst. If your ready to Praise Him with 100% of your being instead of 25%. If your ready for freedom.

Pray for Him to show you any area of your life that is standing in the way of His Lordship.  Lay it down and experience the Freedom that Christ Desires you to have.

Remove any obstacle that stands in Your way, Oh Lord! Search me and know my thoughts. Teach me Your ways. Help me to know your truths, and to walk in Your ways All the Days of my life!