...And I Knew He was the One {Ashlie Oestreich}

I am so excited to be closing out ...And I Knew He was the One, with Ashlie from One Small Town Girl.

Don't Forget that TOMORROW is your last day to link-up your Love Story!

Please Welcome

Ashlie Oestreich

from

One Small Town Girl

to

Beautiful Mommy Feet
...........

Why is My Marriage so dry? {On Garden Hoses & True Love}

I'm one of those hopeless romantics.

Call me cheesy, but I love a happy ending, "twuuue wuvvv" (thank you, Princess Bride) and I love it when the damsel in distress is rescued by the handsome warrior.

The thing is, I've found that I've put a lot of Christian labels on a lot of my fairytale-like expectations just so that I could feel good about them, and honestly, because I really thought I was doing the right thing.

Let me just say that I believe that marriage is a beautiful gift. I do believe that God created us to crave connection, and I believe in seeking the Lord continually regarding our marriages, or relationships in general so that He receives the glory.

But, the fact that we're human often gets in the way of the part where He receives the glory. And intimacy with Him and in our marriages becomes a tad estranged.

Early in my marriage, I became so completely focused on having a Godly relationship that I failed to remain focused God Himself.

Yes, I wanted His will. Yes, I wanted to honor Him. Yes, I wanted us to grow in our walks with Him. (All good things.)

But tucked inside my fairytale ideas and expectations was the idea that a Godly, intimate marriage relationship would facilitate an intimate relationship with God.

I didn't mean for it to be like that, but when I allowed God to examine my heart, that's what was there. It seemed as though when things were harmonious and smooth in my marriage, I was much more consistent with my time in the Word and in prayer. And when things began to unravel, I would still be on my knees, but my mind and heart were all over the place. I was fidgety, begging for answers, confused, discontent, and wondering what in the world was going on.

"And he answered, "Love the Lord your God with all of your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength, and with all your mind, and Love your neighbor as yourself." - Luke 10:27

I had it backwards, friends. You see, there's a reason why the Bible tells us to love the Lord our God with all of our heart, soul, and strength and then to love our neighbor. The first is paramount in order for the second to even become possible. The only way to experience true love and intimacy with our neighbor (like our closest neighbor - our spouses) is to obtain it from the Source of Love. The only Love that can truly fill is Love Himself. Even the most romantic, sweep-you-off-of-your-feet, follow-the-marriage-books-to-a-T relationship will fall painfully short of fulfilling a place that was meant only for Him.

I've tried so many times over the years to take my marriage and make it stretch to fill the corners of my heart (and, who am I kidding - I still fall into this often if I'm not careful!). I would tug, pull at the edges, read books, pray, seek counsel, and no matter what I did - it came up short.

This idea of loving Him first may seem like a no-brainer if you've been in Christian circles for any length of time. But I've found that the ways we get tripped up are often sneaky. I'm sure you've heard the saying, "When Satan tempts you, it won't be to rob a bank." It's true. He will never dangle something crazy in front of our faces - he's too smart for that. He knows that the best way to trip up a Christian is to make them think they're doing God's will. It's often something good, with all of the right intentions (we know where those lead!), but without God at the center of it, it leads down a path of futility and wasted energy.

I'm reminded of a time when I was helping my mom with her garden, and it was my job to water the long rows of plants. I swore I had turned the water on full blast, but alas, when I walked over to pick up the end of the hose, a small trickle of stale, lukewarm water came out of the end and soon came to a sorry halt. I waited, shook the hose to get any kinks out, expecting a gush to arrive. But, clearly, there was no water coming for those thirsty plants.

Muttering under my breath, I walked over to the hydrant and realized there were two hoses. They looked exactly alike, and I had mistakenly grabbed the one that wasn't attached. The one hooked up was trailing into the yard, and a gushing stream of fresh, cold water was creating a huge, needless puddle in the grass. With my unattached hose, however, I would have been waiting quite a long time for water to come considering there was only air at the other end.

Isn't this often like us? Thinking we're doing all of the right things, that we're hooked up to the source, only to be left scratching our heads when things go dry? This reminds me of my futile attempts to revive and strengthen my marriage when it felt like my hose had a trickle at best. Have you ever tried to water a garden with a hose that's not hooked up to the hydrant? There might be leftover water in the hose, and if you shake it, you might be able to spread a few drops over the plants. If I had stood there all day, waiting, shaking the almost-empty hose, those plants would soon shrivel up.

I thought I'd done it all right - I mean, I'd turned on the hydrant, hadn't I?

The hose that wasn't hooked up to the hydrant is like our own expectations, our plans, our understanding, and what seems like the "right way". How many times have I turned on the hydrant and been left frustrated and staring at a shriveled garden? It wasn't because there wasn't water coming out of the Source - I had just chosen the wrong way to get to it.

I became engulfed in finding true love within my marriage, but ignored True Love Himself. After all, wouldn't things be so much smoother if we were having lots of devotionals together? If my husband would just lead the way he was supposed to, and if I would just be the submissive wife of Titus 2? If I would just figure out the respect thing, and he would just figure out the love and dwell with your wife with understanding thing, then God's presence would be made manifest right there in our living room...right?

Not really. Please don't think I'm undermining those important principals of marriage - they are necessary for a healthy relationship. But without God's true love as the source - it becomes exactly what the Apostle Paul writes about in 1 Corinthians 13:1

"Though I speak with the tongues of men and angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal."

We can be doing all of the right things with all of the right goals, and still completely miss the point.

I start to really understand that annoying clanging cymbals thing when I'm standing at the end of that empty garden hose wondering where I went wrong.

The cold, fresh water is still there, my friends. Which hose are you using?

"There is a way that seems right to man, but the end of it leads to death." - Proverbs 16:25

More About Ashlie: Ashlie is a wife to her high school sweetheart, mommy of two little girls, dreamer, thinker, thrift store shopper, recovering perfectionist, and sinner saved by grace.

Ashlie’s heart is to encourage fellow sojourners in the midst of her own struggles. Seeing others discover His vast love and grace makes her do a happy dance! She endeavors to seek God’s truth in the journey while finding His grace in the mess, knowing that at the end of the day, it really is all about Him.

She loves winding gravel roads, muddy romps, and country life, yet Starbucks, skinny jeans, and pedicures hold a special place in her heart, too. This creates a bit of a conundrum that she is still trying to figure out. Lovely word pictures, insane amounts of coffee, silly times with her family, and chocolate make her world go ’round.

Visit her at One Small Town Girl, where writing through her journey gives her a place to breathe. She tweets as @AshlieWrites and can be found on Facebook as well.

...And I Knew He was the One {Lindsay Evatt}

I am so glad to have my precious friend Lindsay back to writing again. She just blesses my heart! She had to take a little break over the last few months and I've missed her greatly! Anyways so glad to have my sweet friend Guest Posting today!

Please Welcome

Lindsay Evatt

from

Evatt's Beautiful Mess

 to

Beautiful Mommy Feet!

.........................

We recently moved.

In our 6 years of marriage, this was our 4th move! I'm growing to hate it! However, there is always one thing I enjoy about moving; the day when I find "the box"! Unpacking is such an arduous task, and it seems to take longer and longer with each move no matter how much junk I think I have eliminated! On my last adventure of unpacking and sorting, it took much longer to go through "the box" and take a walk down memory lane!

You see, "the box" just keeps growing! "The Box" is filled with letters, cards, gifts, pictures, and other random memorabilia exchanged between me and my husband. "The box" is a welcomed trap to deter me from further work of unpacking! With each move, I have usually taken a whole day just sitting and looking through everything. With a recent upgrade to a bigger box, it took much longer this time around! I added all of my journals, overflowing with thoughts and emotions of a teenager/young woman(Me)! I usually laugh until I cry, and cry until I laugh when I read through the story of my life! But there is always one journal in particular, that always reminds me how God works so mysteriously. It's the journal of the year me and my boyfriend were apart. Literally, WE BROKE UP! For some, this may not sound too serious, but to me, it was tragic! We like to refer to this journal as the "roller coaster journal"!

Wesley and I met in church, at the ages of five and seven! We grew up in church together and became great friends, only to start dating when I was 15 and he was 17! We then went off to the same college, and never dreamed we would ever be apart! But after dating for 5 years and two years away from our assumed marriage, we broke up!

Thus my "roller coaster journal" is filled with days in which I really was depending on God to help me through everything, and then other days that I was mad at God and couldn't understand why God wouldn't just let me and Wesley be happy together! Though "young love drama", it was still very real and painful at times!

Going through all of the ups and downs of the break up would be another story in itself, but in brief, we both needed that time away from one another to realize we were taking each other for granted, and depending too much on one another and not enough on God! I was sucking the life out of Wesley because I was so needy and clingy, seeing that he was the only boyfriend I ever had! I also imagined myself as a minister's wife, and he was not feeling the leading in that direction at all! He, on the other hand, had just lost a ton of weight, and wanted to get out there and live life with this new found attention he was getting from everyone for looking so hot! We were a mess!

It took us a year to grow up a little and learn some hard lessons, but we began to work on a friendly relationship, assuming that we would never be "together" again! God had different plans though! Big surprise! :) Just like God always does, He brought the conclusion to our saga, after we had finally resolved that our only hope was to TRUST HIM FOR EVERYTHING! One night, after both of us earnestly prayed in the altar after a church service, we continued our thoughts and prayers in the basement Sunday school classes of the church we had grown up in. We talked for a VERY LONG TIME, and the Lord spoke clearly to both of our hearts! We left the room holding hands, though a very strange, yet glorious feeling! More importantly, we left that room resolved that we could face this world together in true love if we always placed Him above all else in our relationship and in our personal lives!

This May, we will be 8 years removed from that day in the basement of our old church! (The church we were married in just a year later!) In our seven years of marriage, we have brought three precious children into this world, moved 4 times, and haven't had two nickels to rub together most of that time, but God has been faithful! HE hasn't answered all of my/our questions about life and what things He still has in store for us, but we still live with the resolve that we love HIM more than ANYTHING, and we are trusting HIM for EVERYTHING!

Marriage is tough, but when God put us together He knew we would bring Him greater glory together than apart! Yet in His mysterious way of working, we had to be apart for that year to realize that we were not trusting Him enough! Although that year was down right miserable, for the both of us, it brought us even closer, and I am so happy to be serving the Lord side by side with my very best friend! For the 23 years that I've known this very best friend, he has only increased his love that he has for me, and I him, because we love each other out of our devotion to Christ!

We have enjoyed serving in ministry together, and learning the ropes of having a family together. It's not easy some days, and maybe that's why we've moved 4 times in our 6 years of marriage. God wants me to constantly remember! Each time I find "the box", I feel entirely too special, and so undeserving of such a wonderful man! God truly placed us together!

I'm reminded of the Children of Israel! Boy, what a journey they had! But in Deuteronomy Chapter 8, he gave specific instruction to "remember how the Lord you God led you all the way". Some of the experiences were awesome; manna from heaven, Red Sea split, and clothes and shoes growing along with them. (Just to name a few)  While other experiences of life down right stink! They are to "humble you and test you in order to know what is in your heart, whether or not you will keep His commands."

Phew! Doesn't that speak alot about life in general! I'm so glad that I am with THE ONE to face the amazing AND stinky times of life! I will always take the time to REMEMBER the journey too, so we will be found worthy to "go and possess the land"!

The day Wesley and I walked out of that basement, hand in hand, I KNEW HE WAS THE ONE! Yet, everyday with him (and HIM), helps me to know that he still is, and will always be THE ONE FOR ME!

Just a FEW items from "my box"! 

Do you have "a box"?

What type of stuff do you keep there?

If you don't have "a box", I encourage you to start one! Write down all the memories you can possibly think of and store them away along with cards and other special gifts from your spouse! In the trying times of marriage and life, pull out your "box" and REMEMBER where the Lord has brought you from and where He has promised to take you! Take the box out on Valentine's Day or your Anniversary each year and REMEMBER!

Lindsay is a wife, mom, nursing student, and most importantly, a disciple of Christ!
She enjoys blogging over at The Evatt's Beautiful Mess. Along with her fellow mess-makers; Wesley, Bella, Nate, and Marleigh, Lindsay enjoys blogging about the messy realities of life and how God makes them beautiful! They make their home in the upstate of South Carolina, and enjoy serving Christ together with the talents the Lord has blessed them with! 

...And I Knew He was the One {Beautiful Mommy Feet Edition}

Our son Jaxson at 20mos with my husband Trey

As all little girls, when I was growing up I daydreamed about my future husband.  I had him all planned out.  Tall, dark and handsome.  In my imagination I had him penned down to a T and without a doubt he would somehow resemble Dean Cain from "The New Adventures of Superman".  :)

I had self designed every detail I wanted in my future husband: personality, height, style, he had to drink coffee, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.  Oh and he had to love the Lord - at least I had a clue there.  I had to have a husband who was stronger in his faith than I was.

My Sophomore year  in college I was on the Baptist Student Counsel. Over Spring Break we went on a planning retreat along with the Mission Team Leaders.  I didn't know many people in the group, except Trey, I had met him briefly through a friend the previous semester. So that entire weekend he and I hung out and got to know each other better. 

I was too comfortable around him. Within our first few hours together we ended up discussing theology. I really didn't think this could be anything more than a quaint friendship.

We had been dating for about 2 months when we went on separate Mission Trips for the entire summer.  We talked every chance we got.  I loved talking to him about the Lord, and hearing the things that were happening on his trip.

I thought he was a sweet guy but I could not for the life of me decide if I was interested in him. It was weird, to me, that I was so comfortable around him.  Not remotely worried about him thinking about other girls while we were apart.  He was so different from other guys. He treated me like I was the only girl in the world. 

Also, we're total opposites.

• He's quiet and reserved, while I talk even in my sleep!
• He's extremely patient, while that's number one on my daily prayer requests.
• He's a type B personality, I am an A+ personality.
• He hates coffee, I am not sure who I'd be without it.

I could keep going but you get the point.

Everything I had always associated with "Love" this wasn't that, I was so confused.  This wasn't sweaty palms, butterflies, worried over security in the relationship, can't help but drool at the mere thought of him, hoping he likes me as much as I like him, etc. He looked nothing like Dean Cain. He's a little shorter than me and he can't tan to save his life.  But he was amazing! 

He was brought up with the same values as I was. We agreed on how children should be raised. I felt comfortable around his family and he did mine. I saw how he interacted with others and children and the number one selling point was the direction we felt the Lord leading us in our lives was in sync.

He is the most Godly, humble, loving man I know.  He treats me like a princess, even when I'm acting like the evil queen.  I've never met anyone who has challenged me so much in my relationship with the Lord, not because he's always preaching at me- he never does, it's how he lives. He would never say anything mean or off colored about someone. He knows how to put me in my place :) but it's never with words, it's in how he responds to situations with grace.  He's a perfect example of a humble servant leader. 

I remain blown away at the thought of how great a husband and father he is.  He loves me as Christ loves the Church and seeing his love makes me want to learn how to love better.  Don't get me wrong, our marriage isn't always perfect; but when it's not it's usually my fault.  Even though he generally takes the blame. :)

I am so grateful I serve a God who knows me better than I know myself.  I am so grateful He didn't let me handcraft my husband.

I had no idea what to look for in a spouse, so glad God did! I am thankful that God wrote our love story! 

I pray that my son grows up to be just like his daddy and I pray my daughter is blessed to marry a man with such character.

and I Knew He was the One - {Mary Clendenin}

Please Welcome

Mary Clendenin

writer from

to

Beautiful Mommy Feet

.................

I first met the one who would become my husband when I was only 13 years old. He was my best friend’s older brother. I thought he was so handsome and nice…I had a crush on him all during my teen years. He was 19 and knew me as his “little sister’s best friend”. He used to pick us up from driver’s ed.

I never dated much and wasn’t allowed to go out until I was 17. Even then, the few nice guys I went out with (usually only one time), I always compared them to Andrew. I didn’t really “know” Andrew, just always liked him and knew there was something special about him. Mom even said that I didn’t think any guy measured up to Andrew…she was right.
I graduated from college and did not have a boyfriend. I was not one to date just for fun and if I didn’t feel that after the first date it would go anywhere, I wouldn’t go back out with the guy. I wasn’t being snobby, I just wanted to save all of my heart and emotions for the one God had picked out for me. Plus, I was very shy.
I had convinced myself that I would be an old maid school teacher. I had also convinced myself that if I did get married, I would either get a good, godly man or a handsome one…not one in the same package. I look back and see silly I was and how little faith I had for the good gifts God wants to bestow on His children.
In 1997, when I was 22 years old…my best friend was killed in a car accident. We took food to the family and I skipped my college graduation to attend the funeral. It really touched Andrew. He called to talk a week later and then started visiting my family. I never really thought it would go anywhere because we were helping each other through the grieving process.
We started dating and getting to know each other. Andrew was as nice as I thought he was. Life had hit him hard with the death of his sister and it was a difficult time for both of us. Grief over her death, guilt over falling in love during that time and that it took her death to bring us together.
We grew closer and enjoyed one another’s company…then he got scared. {I would find out years later why love was so hard for him}. So he said we should quit seeing one another for a while. It was the day before I started my first teaching job. I was devastated and cried most of the day during teacher meetings. That only lasted a few weeks and we started seeing each other again.
We dated for 6 months and then he proposed before Christmas, after asking my parents’ for my hand in marriage and receiving their blessing. We were married 6 ½ months later. I still can’t believe at times that I am married to Andrew...the one I had liked for so many years. A seed was planted in my heart and slowly grew over the years.
We have had a good marriage, but we have had our ups and downs. I am thankful for each day that I had the privilege of loving my husband. I am so thankful for the seed of love that was planted in my heart at a young age. I found out how much I needed that seed that was planted during 2011…when my husband and his siblings were finally able to talk about years of daily abuse {of every type} they received at the boarding school/concentration camp style cult their parents put them in.
It is a very deep, dark, and heart breaking story. I am thankful that I have the opportunity to love and marry Andrew after learning of all this. It is only by God’s grace that he survived - physically and mentally. I am blessed beyond words that he has any desire to know God and walk so closely with Him, because he was only taught that God was a tyrant. I also understood why we had the initial break up in our relationship ~ he had never known love before (unless he was earning it) and wasn’t sure what to do with it.
Finding out about all of this and struggling to make sense of it all took a toll on our lives and marriage. Andrew had been dealing with this for years and had learned how to deal as best he could. He would have never talked about it, but his other sister finally brought things out in the open. It hit me like a ton of bricks between my eyes. I grew up in a normal home and had only read of things that didn’t even come close to this. My mind could not comprehend the evil that my husband and so many children had endured from birth through teens.
I was a roller coaster of emotions, trying to help him heal, be strong for him, and figure out how to move forward and not become buried under the weight of it all. I also had to work hard not to hate those and forgive those who were supposed to love and protect him, not harm him. There were times that I didn’t know how I could make it and thought that this is not what I signed up for…it was just too much to bear.
I thought my dream life had all been a lie. I didn’t understand why he didn’t tell me about all this. I allowed things to become about “me”. I put myself in his shoes (as best I could) and thought about what I would have done. If he had shared all this before we were married, I am not sure what would have happened. I would have been too young and immature in our love to have handled it. I was shocked at all the years I had spent with his family and wondered how I had missed all the pain the children endured.
God has done a great work in our lives this last year. The worst year of my life drove me to a deeper relationship with God. He was the only way that I survived the struggles and didn’t lose my mind…believe me there were days I thought I would. He was the only way we were able to work through the past and move on toward what God had for us. He is the only way our love and marriage grew stronger.
As I look back over our marriage and travel back to the first time I saw Andrew, I am amazed at the journey God has brought us on. His amazing love and grace has sustained us and brought us to a deeper love for one another and a deeper love of God’s grace and plan for our lives.
Oh, by the way, God did answer my silly request… I did get a good, godly, very handsome, kind man …all wrapped up in one package. ;)


Mary is a stay at home wife and mom. She has been married to the love of her life for almost 14 years and they have 2 sons. They live on a busy dairy farm. She blogs about her life and helping others at The Encouraging Home. She writes about home, family, homeschooling, natural living, homeschooling, and the craziness that comes with it all.

and I Knew He was the One - {Jenifer Metzger}

I am so happy to have my sweet friend Jenifer sharing her love story with us today!

Please Welcome

Jenifer Metzger

from

Sweet Blessings &

Woman to Woman Ministries

to

Beautiful Mommy Feet

.........

This year my best friend, Jeremy, and I will celebrate 15 years of marriage. I cannot even believe I am saying that. In some ways it feels like we have been together forever (in a good way) and in some ways if feels like yesterday. In only two short years I will have been a wife the same number of years I was not a wife, which is a weird feeling. Yes, I know I just told you my age and yes, I know I just told you that I was married at only seventeen.
Let me start with the time I knew he was the one. At a very young age, I had felt the call of God on my life. I knew that I would be the wife of a minister. When Jeremy and I were dating, I told him this. Sometime later he told me that he thought he felt called to be in ministry with children or youth. He said he was still praying about it but that if he realized he was not called to a minister, then he wanted to give me that out. The ‘okay’ to move on to someone who was called to ministry. I knew right then that this was the man I wanted forever and I knew we would someday be in ministry together. Only a few months later, we were married.
Marriage is hard.
Marriage takes work.
When you marry so young, not only do you have to learn how to be a wife, but you are still learning how to be an adult. Then very soon a little blessing comes along and you have to learn how to be a parent.
In the first six years of our marriage we had four children, went through financial struggles, and suffered serious health issues with our daughter. We had many hard times yet many good times.
Humans in general tend to be selfish creatures. When we marry, we have to learn that it is no longer about me. What I want, my needs, my plans, my money. We now have to take someone else’s thoughts, likes and dislikes, schedule, feelings, and traditions into consideration. This is something that fifteen years later, Jeremy and I are still working on.

These days marriage is throw away. People get married with the plan to divorce at the first sign of problems. Marriage is hardly a few years, let alone forever. Daily I praise God for my husband. My marriage is far from perfect. We have struggles, many of them. We are still learning to mesh our two lives together. But I thank God for a man who has the physical ability and desire to take care of his family, wants to be an active part in his children’s lives, loves to make me smile and desires to please God.
If you are married, I greatly encourage you to pray for your husband daily but to also pray that God would help you be the wife He has called you to be. Be slow to anger and quick to forgive. Express your love and appreciation for your husband each and every day. If you are not yet married, pray this prayer anyway. So that when you do find the right man that you would be the woman God wants you to be.

Bio:
Jenifer is the wife to Jeremy, mother to four blessings from Heaven that she homeschools, founder and co-leader of Woman to Woman Ministries and writer at Sweet Blessings. She is an ordinary woman learning to say yes to God. You can find her at www.jenifermetzger.org

and I Knew He was the One - {Wendy Woerner}

I am so blessed to be able to see each of these stories as they come in. There's nothing more beautiful than seeing how God weaves two paths and people together.

Please Welcome

Wendy Woerner

Following in His Footsteps

to

Beautiful Mommy Feet

Don't Forget to Link-Up your Love Story! :)

.......................

I met my husband when I was 15. We were in the same English class at our high school. He sat one row to my left and one seat back. I first noticed him because he was talking to the girl behind me, and he was quoting scripture to her!

1 Corinthians 6:19-20
Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

That caught my attention. Even though I was not attending church at the time, I had been in church enough to recognize the verse. I was not living that verse at the time either, spending a lot of time‘partying’, but I was still impressed. I knew he was someone I wanted to get to know. And I believe now that God thought he was someone I needed to get to know, too. So, one day, I joined their conversation.

A couple of weeks later, he asked me to meet him after the football game that night. This was a big deal to me! I had really grown to like him a lot. He was very cute, very polite, and I didn’t want to disappoint him.

As soon as I got home I found my mom and asked(begged!) her to allow me to go to the game. She said she was not going to take me. I was devastated! I cried, and I remember telling her that if I didn’t go he was going to think that I didn’t like him and I couldn’t bear the thought of that. I did like him so much!

She still made me scrounge a ride to the game.

We dated all throughout high school and I began attending church with him. Though I was saved, I was not really living the Christian life, yet this young man stuck with me. He cared about me, about my happiness. I began to learn and grow, just in little bits, through the time I spent at the church, but I wasn’t living the life yet. We graduated, he entered the Marine Corps, and I went off to Junior College. We were dating long distance, seeing each other as much as we could, but it was tough! I had known I wanted to marry him since about 6 months after we began dating, but my priorities were not what they should have been. I was still spending too much time going to parties, which resulted in some very poor decisions.

My young boyfriend had a good head on his shoulders, though. I remember having a conversation with him and he said these words to me, “I am not going to have a wife who has a bottle in one hand and a baby in the other.” Wow! I was stunned because I did not have an addiction. How could he think that was our future? However, from his perspective, that’s how it looked.

I began to reflect on some choices I had made,and those I was continuing to make. I asked myself, “Am I going to be who my[future] husband expects me to be?” Thus began the real journey to becoming who we are together today.

My husband and I have been married for 16.5years. We have 5 beautiful children. There was a time, several actually, when we were not sure if our marriage could stand the stress of our ‘growing up’ together.We were so young when we found each other! We did not go about things the right way. We got very serious, very quickly. Our decisions were not based on God and His word. But He has been faithful. God keeps His promises!

Though we have had struggles in many areas, we both have held a steadfast belief that we could make it with Christ’s help.Over the years we have sought out churches in whichever area we were living,attended couples’ classes, and read the Word in order to learn and grow closer together,and closer to our God. Our Lord has blessed us abundantly in our seeking. We are not perfect, but we don’t have to be, because Jesus has made us perfect through His sacrifice on the cross.

Through His grace and mercy every day, we are able to continue growing together, raising our children together, laughing together. There are times when we can just look at each other across the room and know we are thinking the same thing. I know he will be there for me,anytime. He is a fabulous provider and an excellent father. He would lay down his life for me. I love him so much and it is only through God’s sovereignty that I could ever be blessed with this husband and the life I am living.
I am a mother and wife, a writer, aunt to a niece and nephews…..only because of Jesus. At any time I may stop, take stock of my life, and think to myself, “He’s still the one,” because I know that God’s hand was in all of it, even when I wasn’t following Him. God promises us in Jeremiah29:11:
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

More About Wendy: Wendy Woerner has been married to her husband Karl for 16.5 years. Together they have 5 beautiful children, ranging in age from 16 months to 14 years old. The family has been homeschooling for 6 years and love it! You can find Wendy blogging at www.followinginhisfootsteps.wordpress.com, documenting their days as they seek to follow Jesus along the way.

and I Knew He was the One - {Wendy Woerner}

I am so blessed to be able to see each of these stories as they come in.  There's nothing more beautiful than seeing how God weaves two paths and people together. 

Please Welcome

Wendy Woerner 

Following in His Footsteps

to

Beautiful Mommy Feet

Don't Forget to Link-Up your Love Story! :)

 .......................

I met my husband when I was 15. We were in the same English class at our high school. He sat one row to my left and one seat back. I first noticed him because he was talking to the girl behind me, and he was quoting scripture to her!

1 Corinthians 6:19-20
Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

That caught my attention. Even though I was not attending church at the time, I had been in church enough to recognize the verse. I was not living that verse at the time either, spending a lot of time‘partying’, but I was still impressed. I knew he was someone I wanted to get to know. And I believe now that God thought he was someone I needed to get to know, too. So, one day, I joined their conversation.
A couple of weeks later, he asked me to meet him after the football game that night. This was a big deal to me! I had really grown to like him a lot. He was very cute, very polite, and I didn’t want to disappoint him.
As soon as I got home I found my mom and asked(begged!) her to allow me to go to the game. She said she was not going to take me. I was devastated! I cried, and I remember telling her that if I didn’t go he was going to think that I didn’t like him and I couldn’t bear the thought of that. I did like him so much!
She still made me scrounge a ride to the game.
We dated all throughout high school and I began attending church with him. Though I was saved, I was not really living the Christian life, yet this young man stuck with me. He cared about me, about my happiness. I began to learn and grow, just in little bits, through the time I spent at the church, but I wasn’t living the life yet. We graduated, he entered the Marine Corps, and I went off to Junior College. We were dating long distance, seeing each other as much as we could, but it was tough! I had known I wanted to marry him since about 6 months after we began dating, but my priorities were not what they should have been. I was still spending too much time going to parties, which resulted in some very poor decisions.

My young boyfriend had a good head on his shoulders, though. I remember having a conversation with him and he said these words to me, “I am not going to have a wife who has a bottle in one hand and a baby in the other.” Wow! I was stunned because I did not have an addiction. How could he think that was our future? However, from his perspective, that’s how it looked.

I began to reflect on some choices I had made,and those I was continuing to make. I asked myself, “Am I going to be who my[future] husband expects me to be?” Thus began the real journey to becoming who we are together today.

My husband and I have been married for 16.5years. We have 5 beautiful children. There was a time, several actually, when we were not sure if our marriage could stand the stress of our ‘growing up’ together.We were so young when we found each other! We did not go about things the right way. We got very serious, very quickly. Our decisions were not based on God and His word. But He has been faithful. God keeps His promises!
Though we have had struggles in many areas, we both have held a steadfast belief that we could make it with Christ’s help.Over the years we have sought out churches in whichever area we were living,attended couples’ classes, and read the Word in order to learn and grow closer together,and closer to our God. Our Lord has blessed us abundantly in our seeking. We are not perfect, but we don’t have to be, because Jesus has made us perfect through His sacrifice on the cross.

Through His grace and mercy every day, we are able to continue growing together, raising our children together, laughing together. There are times when we can just look at each other across the room and know we are thinking the same thing. I know he will be there for me,anytime. He is a fabulous provider and an excellent father. He would lay down his life for me. I love him so much and it is only through God’s sovereignty that I could ever be blessed with this husband and the life I am living.
I am a mother and wife, a writer, aunt to a niece and nephews…..only because of Jesus. At any time I may stop, take stock of my life, and think to myself, “He’s still the one,” because I know that God’s hand was in all of it, even when I wasn’t following Him. God promises us in Jeremiah29:11:
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

More About Wendy: Wendy Woerner has been married to her husband Karl for 16.5 years. Together they have 5 beautiful children, ranging in age from 16 months to 14 years old. The family has been homeschooling for 6 years and love it! You can find Wendy blogging at www.followinginhisfootsteps.wordpress.com, documenting their days as they seek to follow Jesus along the way.

The Accidental Wife - {Guest Post Richele McFarlin}

I am so honored and excited to have Richele McFarlin sharing her heart today.  I am so blessed by her transparency in sharing that not everyone comes from the fairy tale beginnings, however we serve a God that runs to the broken and quickly forgives His children even when we struggle to forgive ourselves.

Please Welcome

Richele McFarlin

writer from

Under the Golden Apple Tree

to

Beautiful Mommy Feet

and don't forget to link-up your story for the chance to win Paul Tripps book "What Did You Expect?"

  .......................................

With pregnancy test in hand I began to pray. 

“Please God, not pregnant.  Please, not pregnant…not pregnant.”

The strangeness of this prayer was not lost on me.  After having lived without the Lord’s guidance for so long I was praying for God to save me from the natural consequence of sin.  Desperation drowns out reason. 

Weakness flooded my body and my knees buckled.  The result window revealed my life would be forever changed.  How could this be happening to me now? While the biological answer is simple, I felt like many women in my situation who all of a sudden feel it is unreasonable to expect pregnancy while being unmarried and sexually active.

Shaking fingers dialed my boyfriend’s number.  Thoughts of last night’s discussion on the merit of their relationship pierced my mind.  He sounded concerned by the tremble in my voice and said he would be right over.   

He took the news like hearing a bad weather report.  How could he be so calm?  His thoughts centered on logistics.  Without medical insurance a plan had to be made concerning the financial obligation of the birth.  He said that marriage may be the only option since he had insurance through his employment.

Marriage the may be the only option.

My heart shattered. 

I tired to scoop up the pieces of my heart but it kept falling through my fingers.  Pieces hit the ground and some would forever be embedded in that moment. 

The day was not celebrated with throwing rice, flowers, or an elegant reception.  It was a day.  The next day happened as if it was all a dream. 

Was there any hope of a loving marriage and a happy family?

Living outside the will of God is like living in an alternate reality.  You doubt where you are and where you should be.  The questions you ask yourself are never ending. 

Is he the man I should be married to?  Am I the wife I should be?  Is this the family God intended?  Will he ever love me?  Does he want to be married to me?  Would he have married me if I did not get pregnant?

Mercy, grace, love and forgiveness break down dark walls and shine God’s light into your soul. The Lord can scoop up the pieces.  Yes, even the smallest bits and restore your heart.  Even on the days you cannot forgive yourself.  Even on the days you doubt love exists.  Even on the days the pieces seem too small and too jagged to be restored.  The Lord wants your heart to be whole and will put it back together as many times as you are foolish enough to break it apart. 

Love never left the equation but it was buried by a logical decision to marry.  My marriage felt unauthentic since my hand was not asked for on bended knee. I would never have a white gown; a first pregnancy introduced with joy, the reassurance marriage was not forced.  I spent years frustrating my husband with unreasonable behavior which disguised pleas for proof of love.  I spent years overlooking the proof.  The enemy uses a heart determined to stay broken to cast doubt and fear. The enemy will cripple you with the past sin you refuse to leave at the cross.  If you live in the shadow of sin long enough your soul will wilt.  I love my husband and thank God for him and my family.  The Lord has blessed my marriage with love and four reflections of heaven.  His mercy did that despite my sin.  

My hope is that every woman experiences a pure marriage.  Marriage is the picture of Christ’s love.  When it is tainted the reverberations last throughout the years as a natural consequence of going outside the will of God.  Frail humans were not intended to go down the rocky path of sin.  The Lord is protecting you when He demands you walk in spirit and not in the flesh.

If you are an accidental wife I know the questions, doubt and ache in your heart.  Be encouraged that the Lord heals brokenness and restores hearts. 

More about the heart of Richele McFarlin: Richele is a freelance writer, blogger, and business owner.  Most importantly she is a mother of four reflections of God’s love and married to a man who she does not deserve. She is thankful for the trials and blessings that serve to bring her closer to the Lord.  She desperately tries to live a purposeful life amongst spilled milk and crumbs on the carpet.  You can find her blogging at Under the Golden Apple Tree.  You can also find her on Facebook!

And I Knew He was the One -{Guest Post Ann Stringer}

Here's a post from my sweet friend Ann Stringer from Stringer Mama. I am so excited to have her posting here today. I appreciate her precious friendship so much!

Dont don't forget to link up for the
...and I Knew He was the One
Contest and Link-Up!

~Please Welcome~

Ann Stringer

Stringer Mama

to

Beautiful Mommy Feet

....................

“Dad!!! I really want a boyfriend!”

I sobbed, and I mean SOBBED on my dad’s shoulder. My sister was already planning on marrying her
boyfriend and she was YOUNGER than I was by two years! In just three short months I would be graduating from college and then heading back to literally “no-man’s land” at least, no CHRISTIAN man I would ever dream of marrying lived in no-man’s land.

My hometown was a mere 500 people and our church was only about 30 people so it truly was a place where I would not meet a man of my dreams.

Therefore, I was devastated by this state of singleness I found myself. My dad then told me those horrible, dreadful words that every fiber of my BEING wanted to throw back at him and make him take back. “Maybe God doesn’t want you to get married.” HA! That’s ridiculous! My life verse at
the time was:

“Delight
thyself in the Lord and

He will
give you the desires of thine heart.”

Psalm 37:4

The desire of my heart is to be married. Period. Dad just didn’t understand that! Oh, but he did and as he continued to talk to me I realized that maybe I wasn’t delighting myself in the Lord like I thought I was at all. I had made this demand for a husband and was at that moment throwing a little temper tantrum at my Lord because He wasn’t giving me what I wanted.

It took a little time for this new thought to sink from my head into my heart but within a week my heart and mind had clicked together and I prayed:

“Lord, I don’t
understand why there is no man in my

life because I know it’s
what I desire.

But I want what You
desire for my life to be what I desire.

Please help me be
content with being single if that is what You plan for me.

I know that You are
the only one who can take this ache and emptiness

and fill it up with a love for You.

Amen.”

A week later I was shopping for a house there in that small town two blocks from my parents house and I was excited about this new life I was preparing for myself. I found a house and was in the process of filling out the necessary paperwork to apply for a loan when I got a phone call. It was a man. And he asked me to go on a date with him. Needless to say, I did not buy that house because at the end of that date this pastoral-major classmate asked me to be his girlfriend and within 6 weeks we were engaged.

That man is now my wonderful and amazing husband and even today we still stand in awe about how God brought us together.
I wasn’t the only one who had to find their contentment in God and God alone
first, my husband did too. But when he did, God laid my name on his heart and
that was when he made that call. You can read more about our amazing love story in a 6-part series on my blog, Stringer Mama.

 

In HIS Grip,

About Ann: Being married to the pastor may seem to be an awe-inspiring position, but for me, I know that life as a pastor's wife is not abnormal from any other woman seeking to serve God with her life. Because there are so many Pastor's wives out there who feel as though they are alone in their attempts to keep their fishbowl or image spotless, I have decided to let people SEE into my fishbowl and in the process encourage other women who will find they are just like me. Women struggle with many of the same things and Pastor's wives are no exception - feel free to come alongside and see how I live my life enjoying the string of responsibilities and loves that God has fashioned just for me on my blog www.StringerMama.com!