I took my children to go and visit their Grandparents in South Carolina last week. That, by the way, is a 6+ hour drive. With a van that is having some problems, I can honestly tell you, that drive can make me a little anxious and impatient at times.
At one point on the way back to Kentucky, I looked back at my son and noticed that he drew with green crayon all over my freshly washed window by his seat. The words I felt coming to my lips were less than encouraging or building up. I mean, he's 5, shouldn't he know better? Do I really have to tell him "everything"? I knew my attitude was less than... and I knew my words had potential to be hurtful, so I took a moment and Prayed before I spoke. "Lord, what do I say here. I can't be passive, but I don't want to hurt his feelings either."
The Lord graciously changed my tone of voice and Oh my goodness I'm so grateful He did. He changed my words and my reaction to say: "Jaxson, What did you do? Do you think that was a good idea?" He said: "Look Mommy. I made you a pretty picture with my favorite color, Green. I thought it was a good idea because I was making it for you and I thought you would think it was beautiful. Do you like it?"
Oh how my words would have unknowingly crushed his precious spirit if I hadn't surrendered them to the Lord. I then took the opportunity to Praise his artwork and tell him that it's beautiful but I'd rather have it on paper, so I could keep it forever, and we calmly talked about appropriate places to color.
"Godspeed" is on my playlist because nearly 10 years ago I used to listen to this song on repeat, praying over my future children and daydreaming about what it would be like to be the mom of a precious baby boy. I daydreamed about the Super Hero stage (that he just so happens to be in right now). The day's he would be so worn out from saving the world from Supervillian's and Bad Guys that he would accidentally fall asleep on the couch, still in his cape.
I listen to it to remind myself just how precious and fleeting these days are and that no matter how exhausted and overwhelmed I am, to treasure my precious "Spiderman".
At one point on the way back to Kentucky, I looked back at my son and noticed that he drew with green crayon all over my freshly washed window by his seat. The words I felt coming to my lips were less than encouraging or building up. I mean, he's 5, shouldn't he know better? Do I really have to tell him "everything"? I knew my attitude was less than... and I knew my words had potential to be hurtful, so I took a moment and Prayed before I spoke. "Lord, what do I say here. I can't be passive, but I don't want to hurt his feelings either."
The Lord graciously changed my tone of voice and Oh my goodness I'm so grateful He did. He changed my words and my reaction to say: "Jaxson, What did you do? Do you think that was a good idea?" He said: "Look Mommy. I made you a pretty picture with my favorite color, Green. I thought it was a good idea because I was making it for you and I thought you would think it was beautiful. Do you like it?"
Oh how my words would have unknowingly crushed his precious spirit if I hadn't surrendered them to the Lord. I then took the opportunity to Praise his artwork and tell him that it's beautiful but I'd rather have it on paper, so I could keep it forever, and we calmly talked about appropriate places to color.
Lord, place a seal over our mouths. Help us to constantly remember that our children are constantly being shaped by our actions and reactions. May I encourage them in You and never discourage them from being the Young people You created them to be. May I be worthy of the precious gifts You've entrusted me with.
YOUR clay-
Melissa Bradley
"Godspeed" is on my playlist because nearly 10 years ago I used to listen to this song on repeat, praying over my future children and daydreaming about what it would be like to be the mom of a precious baby boy. I daydreamed about the Super Hero stage (that he just so happens to be in right now). The day's he would be so worn out from saving the world from Supervillian's and Bad Guys that he would accidentally fall asleep on the couch, still in his cape.
I listen to it to remind myself just how precious and fleeting these days are and that no matter how exhausted and overwhelmed I am, to treasure my precious "Spiderman".
Love it! It can be so easy to quickly respond and not think about how it hurts them or breaks their spirit. Great encouragement to stop,think and pray first.
ReplyDeleteBreath taking, made me stop and think how often I react instead of stop, think and pray first.
ReplyDeleteits amazing how important our tone is with our kids. I always try (but don't always succeed) to talk softer the more frustrated get. I am a mommy in progress and I'm overseeing three tender hearts. It's an overwhelming and amazing responsibility! :)
ReplyDeleteI love this. I have been there many time where I wanted to get upset but then I realized that in my child's mind, she might of meant something different. Have a blessed day!
ReplyDeleteMe too. I sometimes struggle with this so much! Glad I'm not the only one :)
ReplyDeleteA beautiful story Melissa! I've been in this place too. Sometimes I do well to stop before I speak, and other times, well, I'll just say my daughter is a forgiving child.
ReplyDeleteIn Christ,
Laura